Funny Personal Story (Repost)

Sunday, December 24, 2006

Funny personal story My ex and i stayed at this hotel and upon entering I notice this steel hook in the ceiling over the bed. I was like, "Noway!" I ran to the closet to find that they had one of those chairs that hang over the bed with the hole in the bottom. You know, like she sits in it and he's under it with his junk in the hole. So we fell so in love with this thing that we went and bought one. I was all manly in nothing but a tool belt hangin this thing over the bed, now the intructions said nothing about what a stud is or how to find one, so I naturally assumed they were referring to myself. So it's done and up, and time for some fun. It lasted about five minutes before she was rollin off the bed onto the floor laughing all the way down, and I could have sworn she took my dick with her. Plaster starts falling in my face and mouth, and relization hit, and my eyes got really wide a split second before that three pound piece of steel completed it's 8' descent right into my change purse. Meanwhile, she is rolling around the floor laughing hysterically and all I could think was "Can you believe this woman could look me in the eye with a straight face and say that she loves me?"

Essay on women...or senseless ramblings by Xian (Repost)

Sunday, March 21, 2004

Essay on women...or senseless ramblings by Xian So I popped by the Starbucks drive-thru at the clocktower in Herndon this morning for my daily wakeup call and this same girl is at the window. She's telling me again how much she loves the mixes I always have playing and dancing, to which I just smile, tip her well to spread the plur, and go about my day. But today I was thinking, "Was she flirting? Being nice cuz it's her job? Or just being extra friendly cuz she's a party kid and I was playing good music?" That set off a whole chain of thought that made me go for a drive and think (I do my best thinking while driving). I was thinking about how if she was flirting, I would have no idea what to say to her. I've been out of the game for so long I don't even know what the game is anymore. Some of you might laugh and poke fun now but those that know me know that I am brutally candid about all things and not interested in projecting stupid ass images least of all what a "pimp" I am. So anyway I was thinking about how easy it was when I was younger. If I liked a girl things just kind of fell into place. Now that I'm older, it doesn't work like that. I have to put effort into it, and I'm afraid to do that. The question then was why am I afraid? The answer? Women scare me. A woman can squash you with a word. All my year's experience with women has taught me one thing, "Women are a force of nature". They come into your life with all the force of a hurricane and all the beauty of a lightening storm. The storm is both frightening and wonderful at the sametime. You cannot lie to women, you can't contain them, and you certainly can't control them. Some of you might think otherwise but you will never control any woman anymore than she allows you to. Even the sisterhood that they have among themselves mystifies me. Men will never have the same kind of brotherhood or support network that women have with each other. I don't know where I'm going with all this except to say that if you are out there and you have the storm in your life, cherish the hell out of it. Don't fight it or try to control it, you may as well be beating your fist against the wind. Just love it for the majesty and beauty that it is.

Resolve (Repost)

Tuesday, January 06, 2004

Resolve I wrote this as my New Years resolve about a month ago but it's worth sharing. I have been doing some thinking last night and today and I have decided on a resolution for myself. I don't know if I'm posting this here for any reason except in the hopes that a few others may be inspired to take this to heart and make it a part of their lives as well. I have been living as a priest for nearly four years now. I haven't had sex, and I haven't dated anyone. This came about as a result of my divorce. I looked backk on my life and saw a string of serious relationships with nary a week between each, and I relized that I was afraid to be alone. I needed to take some time off of trying to fulfill somebody else's needs to do some soul searching to find out what my needs were and how to take care of them. I have learned alot about myself in this time alone and here are some decisions I've made for myself at it's conclusion. 1) I will never enter a relationships with regrets from past relationships again. She deserves better and so do I! 2) Nobody in my life will ever wonder how much they mean to me again. Through action AND deed the people I care about will know exactly how special they are to me. 3) I am not a messiah, there are burdens I can handle and there are burdens I can't. I will look at every problem presented to me and be honest with myself as to wether I can really help or not, no matter how much I want to help. 4) I have always had a problem with intimacy. Things from my chilhood have always made this a road block for me, making every relationship I've had hit a plateau, and my fear of intimacy has always prevented me from moving beyond it. I have delved so far into it that I now crave hugs I used to cringe from, i even have dreams of holding people's hands. Sounds silly but these were huge fears for me. 5) I will never let my fear of intimacy or anything else keep me from committing myself completely to someone I love again. Every relationship I've ever had has had me with one foot in the commitment and one foot in bachelorhood. 6) I will do everything I can to make sure every person I meet is happier for having met me. I have crossed paths with thousands of people in my lifetime and I abhor what some of them must think of if ever reminded of me again. 7) I have no place in my life nor time to waste on fear. These are some key points from my four years at the University of Christian. As I throw my hat back into the romantic ring I hope they will both help you to understand me better and inspire all of you to improve upon the quality of your lives. 7) I have no place in my life nor time to waste on fear. Now having said all that, I'm back!!!!! Where are the womenz?